It is time to do a recap of all the steps that we have covered so far to reach our new empowered state of being!
- Step 1 – The Empowered Identity
- Step 2 – What empowered and disempowered versions am I being? Personal assessment
We start the journey of learning about ourselves, our sub-conscious beliefs, and re-discover what empowers and disempowers us. I share my own experience of my Personal Assessment on my blog post and you can listen to our podcast on Step 2 here.
- Step 3 – Imagination
How to reclaim our imagination, which in turn gives us the ability to create and innovate through any obstacles. Here in my blog post, I shared my experience, being a child in my blog post, and how I imagined a world where all rivers and waterfalls are made of chocolate! And, the link to the podcast.
- Step 4 –Intuition
In this Step, we discuss our obsession for analytical data, and how our current education system is killing our intuitive abilities. Step 4 inspired me to review my intuitive instinct and embrace it instead of dismissing it. View my blog post here.
- Step 5 – Connecting to our Real Purpose
The most important Step of the EP7 program! It is all about our Real Purpose and how it is more about creating it than finding it! I had to stress on the “Real” as I shared my experience of Purpose in this blog post.
- Step 6 – Make it Happen
Armed with my True Purpose, and aligned in my flow, I was then able to move to Step 6 which was all about how to make it happen! I discovered that when you are living your true purpose, you become alive, and nothing stands in your way to make it happen! View my blog post here.
However, I could not help myself wondering about:
“How do I ensure that this change is sustainable, and what guarantee do I have that my brain is not going to play its usual tricks and default back to my old habits?”
My Work-in-Progress Status
Armed with my new outlook on life, I was excited to move forward and dare to live new experiences without fear or apprehension. Easier said than done as I realised that although I was empowered in my new version of being, my family, friends and colleagues were still the same. I pictured how excited they would be to experience this new version of me, and how we would all live, happily ever after! But the reality was far from it!
For example, I was always quite hard on my children, often being called the “Dragon Mum” by them and other mothers as well. The truth is that deep down I always had this fear that if my children failed, it would mean that I also failed as a parent, and that feeling always put me straight into an ‘overprotection mode’ as I refused to acknowledge that I could potentially fail as a parent, whatever my definition of ‘failure as a parent’ meant (as it is subjective and each of us have our own definition of what ‘failure’ means).
When I finally accepted this and was ready to move on, I was convinced that my children would be excited to embrace the new me and all will be well! But instead, the more I tried to convince them that I was ‘not taking things personally’, the more they did not believe me!
I was forced to conclude that though I had moved on to be a better version of myself, in my children’s eyes, they still saw me as ‘Dragon Mum’.
Understanding Your Environment for Sustainable Change
Remembering that those around you still perceive you as the old version of you is key to ensure sustainable change.
“We need to align our environment so it affirms our new version of being, until it becomes permanent, otherwise we will slip back into our outdated version”
In the EP7 Program, we call this stage, “Building a Bridge”, as a bridge offers a healthy dialogue about how both parties can evolve in the relationship. At first, I did try and build a bridge with my kids, but I made the mistake of putting sided conditions to this bridge, as again I wanted to be in control, and it was a ‘bridge according to my terms’, which was doomed for failure! I carried on pushing the bus uphill and wondered where I went wrong!
The moment I realised that I was still trying to be controlling by putting terms on my ‘bridge’, and let go, it slowly started getting better. I thought I was a new version and on the other side of the bridge waiting for them to cross. Little did I know that I was still being the Dragon mum and the bridge enforcer! The work in progress is real!
“A bridge should offer a healthy dialogue about how both parties can evolve in the relationship, without judgement and done with compassion and understanding.”
From my experience, the transition was not smooth sailing, and anyone who thinks that it will be, must be prepared to adapt to circumstances, and stay true to themselves through this process. Giving ourselves the permission to be a Work-In-Progress! (WIP) is vital!
Here are some tips when going through the WIP stage:
- Compassion and Patience for You and Them
Before you seek change from them, are you being what you want from them?
Are you going to give them the chance to go through change like you give yourself?
- Free Will
Any change comes with the certainty that we will fall back into our old habits as the brain defaults into “what it knows best, old habits!” Understanding this is key, and as we fall back and with our Free Will, we manage to come out of it, we eventually form new connections in our brain to move to sustainable change. Resilience and Repetition are key!
Just because we have gone through change, does not mean that those around us have, and therefore we should leave our personal judgement on those that have not!
When we are living in the present, we live new experiences without comparison with the past, and that is the first step into shaping a new version of ourselves.
We have reached the end of our series on the 7 Steps of the EP7 program, and I hope that you have enjoyed this journey as much as I have! If you are interested in the EP7 program, you are welcome to contact me!
Wishing you all good mental health!